Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Two questions every married couple hates.
Since Roland and I have gotten married, I've been avoiding people we don't see on a regular basis. You know, those people that you invite to the wedding because they've known you or your parents almost your whole life, but you only see them once or twice a month. It's not like I don't enjoy seeing these people, it's that I don't enjoy the questions they ALWAYS ask. If you're not married, I suggest you and your significant other go ahead and get together to come up with some answers for these two questions because you will hear them all. the. time. after you're married.
Question 1: How's the married life?
While not an intrusive question, what do they expect? No? We've hit some bumps? I didn't do any laundry last week and Roland woke up on Monday morning with no clean undershirts? (which does actually happen some days... sorry Roland) It's expected to be a transition period after getting married, but no one wants to hear about that. No one wants to hear about trying to figure out meal planning and where to start decluttering. So instead of coming up with some awesomely sarcastic remark we usually just end up nodding our heads with some un-committed sound followed by a lazy "oh yeah it's great" or "its going!" Sure they're just being nice, and I'm probably just being weirdly annoyed by it, but it's really frustrating some days.
Question 2: When are you having kids?
I know our parents mean well, and I know my parents would literally KILL someone for some grandkids, but we've only been married 3 months. Some people start that cycle as soon as they get married and I'm just not ready for that life. I don't think either of us are. Actually I know neither of us are, because we talked about it a couple weeks ago. Roland's mom (love her) text him telling him about someone in their church found out she couldn't have anymore kids and how we should start trying now just in case something like that happens to us and we have to start a long process. Although she's right. If we wait a year or two to start having kids and find out something's wrong and we have to go a different direction, that could take a while. But on the other hand, what if there's nothing wrong, and we start trying and then boom. Now we have a kid that neither one of us were prepared for.
I know a lot of people have offense with this question because you don't really know what a couple is going through kids wise, but I'm mostly annoyed with this question because it's so repetitive and I don't have an answer. We're not planning on having kids within the next year. There's at least 10 dozen other things on our mind at a time that doesn't include reproducing. Besides, what. is. the. rush. Sure Roland and I lived together for 2 years before we got married (and as much as people want to argue there's not a difference between living together and being married, there is.) but I want some time for it to be us. When we have kids that's it, it'll be about the kids for the rest of our lives, which I'm ok with. But for now, I want it to be about us. And I'm tired of people making me feel like we're not following suit or doing what we're supposed to be doing by having kids as soon as we get married.
So come up with some funny answers to these like "I'm actually a man" or "we learned we hate each other" it'll be fun to see their faces. Happy Wednesday.