interesting title here

I always feel bad for Thursday, because people are glad that it's here, but too anxious/excited for Friday, so they usually drag by. Sorry Thursday.

Today's going to be pretty random, that's really all I can say to prepare you for this post:


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» Our tub has a gash in it. That's right, a gash. How does this happen? AND WHO IS A TUB          DOCTOR? Here's hoping our apartment will replace it as opposed to just patching it (yeah right).

» Roland brought me Starbucks this morning, I know, I'm the luckiest girl alive.

» I'm pretty sure I'm going to need glasses. This morning when I turned my computer on it usually takes my eyes a couple minutes to adjust, but it took them like 30 to get it together this morning. 

» I got some new shoes yesterday, I know I know "but Sarah, what about your spending ban? Were these shoes $20?" NO THEY WEREN'T BUT THEY WERE TOO GOOD OF A DEAL TO TURN THEM AWAY AND ROLAND IS AN ENABLER (which is something I love about him). I got these awesome ankle boot wedges for the low low price of $49 doll hairs. And these boots that I've been pining for, for a long time for only $58. You can't turn shoes away at these prices, guys. 

» I'm really annoyed that it's starting to get light earlier. In the morning I get up and let Toby out at around 6:30 (7:00 lately) I literally roll out of bed throw on some pants, boots, and a jacket and we go outside. That's fine when it's dark and no one can see me standing there with my hair in a crazy bun, cheetah pajama pants, cheetah boots, and a t-shirt 3 sizes too big. But now it's light at 6:45. 

» It's so funny when we see these old men for long periods of time at work, and their wives make us treats. The husbands usually come in "My wife made these for you guys, for putting up with me for so long." 

» This weekend I'm going to a chocolate festival. Can you guys believe such a magical thing exists? I'm so excited. 

» Today is Kay's birthday!

» Last but not least, our internet issues still haven't been resolved. It's getting to the point where we might as well just cancel it and go through someone else, because it's kind of ridiculous how hard it is to CHANGE OUR ADDRESS. We've now gone 3 days without wifi. 

That's all for now folks.

Two questions every married couple hates.

Since Roland and I have gotten married, I've been avoiding people we don't see on a regular basis. You know, those people that you invite to the wedding because they've known you or your parents almost your whole life, but you only see them once or twice a month. It's not like I don't enjoy seeing these people, it's that I don't enjoy the questions they ALWAYS ask. If you're not married, I suggest you and your significant other go ahead and get together to come up with some answers for these two questions because you will hear them all. the. time. after you're married.

Question 1: How's the married life?

While not an intrusive question, what do they expect? No? We've hit some bumps? I didn't do any laundry last week and Roland woke up on Monday morning with no clean undershirts? (which does actually happen some days... sorry Roland) It's expected to be a transition period after getting married, but no one wants to hear about that. No one wants to hear about trying to figure out meal planning and where to start decluttering. So instead of coming up with some awesomely sarcastic remark we usually just end up nodding our heads with some un-committed sound followed by a lazy "oh yeah it's great" or "its going!" Sure they're just being nice, and I'm probably just being weirdly annoyed by it, but it's really frustrating some days.

Question 2: When are you having kids?

I know our parents mean well, and I know my parents would literally KILL someone for some grandkids, but we've only been married 3 months. Some people start that cycle as soon as they get married and I'm just not ready for that life. I don't think either of us are. Actually I know neither of us are, because we talked about it a couple weeks ago. Roland's mom (love her) text him telling him about someone in their church found out she couldn't have anymore kids and how we should start trying now just in case something like that happens to us and we have to start a long process. Although she's right. If we wait a year or two to start having kids and find out something's wrong and we have to go a different direction, that could take a while. But on the other hand, what if there's nothing wrong, and we start trying and then boom. Now we have a kid that neither one of us were prepared for.

I know a lot of people have offense with this question because you don't really know what a couple is going through kids wise, but I'm mostly annoyed with this question because it's so repetitive and I don't have an answer. We're not planning on having kids within the next year. There's at least 10 dozen other things on our mind at a time that doesn't include reproducing. Besides, what. is. the. rush. Sure Roland and I lived together for 2 years before we got married (and as much as people want to argue there's not a difference between living together and being married, there is.) but I want some time for it to be us. When we have kids that's it, it'll be about the kids for the rest of our lives, which I'm ok with. But for now, I want it to be about us. And I'm tired of people making me feel like we're not following suit or doing what we're supposed to be doing by having kids as soon as we get married.


So come up with some funny answers to these like "I'm actually a man" or "we learned we hate each other" it'll be fun to see their faces. Happy Wednesday.

The Return from Hell: Target

Customer Service. The best consistent customer service I've ever received is at Dillard's. They're always willing to help, you can always find someone without hunting, if you get entered into their CAD (don't ask, I have no idea what it stands for) system they will call you when they get things in that you like, and the operations manager is pretty hot. (Maybe I'm being a bit bias since it's my husband) But, out of all the stores I've been in, Dillard's is above and beyond customer service wise. That fact was just chiseled in stone a couple weeks ago when Roland and I tried to return something to Target. Night.Mare. on 82nd street.

On Christmas Eve I made a last minute Christmas purchase, a tablet for Roland. A couple weeks ago, Roland decided he was going to take it back because he thought of something else he'd rather have (which is fine, this is tradition now, I've come to grips with the fact that I'm a terrible gift giver and Roland will always return my presents.) But when we dragged ourselves off the couch one lazy Sunday and made our way to Target, we had no idea what we were in store for.

When we got there they opened it, which normally I would understand, but we had never even broken the seal. So after they ripped open the box with a blunt object and checked to make sure some number matched another number, they started scanning and that's when it all went downhill. Apparently the serial number that pops up after you scan the receipt didn't match the serial number on the box. Ok, no big deal I KNOW I bought it here, so surely there's something they'll be able to do. They sent someone back to see if the serial number on the box matched the number on the rest of the ones in the case. Yes, it matched the rest of the case, so this item had definitely come from this Target, and apparently the receipt had been printed wrong.

So now that they KNOW that this item came from this Target, you'd think they'd override something and make it easy on the customer, no.sir.ree. They gave us a number to call, and said there was nothing they could do. So 30 minutes in line, they opened the pristine box, made us feel like we had done something wrong, then gave US the problem to handle it. WHAT?

After Roland called a multiple times, they finally got it resolved and they gave us our money back. But the chances of me shopping in Target again are slim to none. Maybe Alex Dillard should look into selling major electronics. (This will never happen I know, because they're not Sears. But I can dream.)

I realize this is a long post, and there are no pictures. So if you made it to the end CONGRATS.  Have a great day.

Letters: The refreshing vs. the mundane

Amber's marriage letters have always been a source of inspiration to me, as a newly wed trying to navigate our new lives together. Other than our parents, Roland and I don't have any close married friends. And as parents they can sometimes be a bit bias when giving their opinion as what's better for me rather than "us." I mean they're parents and that's what they've been doing for 24+ years, so no one can blame them.

This year there are going to be a lot of changes in our household, a lot of questioning "can we do it" before the fact and the ever frustrating "why did we do it" among the crazy days. There's nothing I'd love more than to be able to look back on our time as newly weds with the world at our fingertips and smile. Reading how we grew together, better, stronger. The letters probably won't always be to my husband, but that's where we're starting today.

Roland, 

This past weekend we broke from our normal routine. Instead of making dinner and playing an hour of rock-paper-scissors to see who gets to pick the movie, we celebrated a Thunder win live and in person, we beat my parents at cards, we went jogging (that's right, I jogged). It was fun, it was new, it was refreshing. To do something outside the normal day-to-day routine is a big deal for creatures of habit like ourselves, and this weekend we stepped outside those lines in a big way. It became one of those weekends we'll look back on and think of all the memories we made together (and with Bennie).

After thinking of how fun stepping outside our routine was, it made me realize how much I craved our everyday schedules. The time in the morning when we talk about our busy day ahead of us, our lunch date through out the week when we gorge ourselves on delicious salsa and plan for the evening or make jokes about the salsa almost being TOO good. And our evenings together are my favorite. Standing in the kitchen, talking about our days or our newest adult problem (this week it's the internet) while you sneak too hot food off the stove will always be my favorite time with you. 

As refreshing as new experiences are, sometimes coming back to the "same-old-same-old" is equally as refreshing. That's what keeps me calm about the unknown of the future. Knowing that no matter where we are, together is all that matters. 

Dark Places: Brutal

Brutal. It's all I can think of when I think of this book. A brutal 7 days to finish it. A brutally written book about a brutally murdered family and the effect it had on the lone innocent survivor.

Libby is an adult that can't seem to fulfill her adult-like duties. No job, no more money, and only her "bad blood" and cat to keep her company. As for character growth I think she gets an A. She does change a lot through the book, going from a moocher to a semi-adult, able to make the decision to actually BUY chapstick (gasp). But for the most part, she was hard to deal with. I was welcoming the chapters from the past because I was so tired of listening to her whine.

I mean, I understand. Her family was murdered and her brother's in jail for it. She has basically no one, but I don't feel sorry for her. She put herself in this situation she's in. She's the one that decided to take the easy "poor pitiful me" road, and push everyone away at the same time.

Throughout the book you get glimpses into the past from Ben Day and Patty Day's perspective. Things they did on that awful day that changed the Day's lives as they knew them. I liked Ben's chapters the best, mostly because they gave you a piece of the puzzle, a cliffhanger, and a hint that just about everyone Libby talked to was lying.

What I didn't like was the constant change in tense. One second you'd be reading from Ben's perspective in first person and a couple sentences later it's still Ben's perspective, but from a third person's point of view. Some random narrator that just came out of nowhere. There were a couple sections I had to stop and re-read whole pages because all of a sudden I had no idea who was talking about whom.

I have this habit of when I'm struggling through a book, I look it up on IMDB to see if it's already been cast, sometimes it makes it easier to read if I can picture other people that someone else has picked, luckily this one had been. Unluckily, I don't think Charlize Theron makes much sense for Libby. Most of the other cast makes sense, or I don't know them well enough to care.

All I'm hoping for is a normal book-to-movie rendition. Gone Girl was a great movie, but it was also 3 hours long. And that children, is why most movies just graze the books. Because no one wants to re-watch a 3 hour movie. Looking at you Transformers: Age of Extinction.

So, in the end: It was book that was hard to follow and pretty annoying 80% of the time. BUT, the story line itself was pretty interesting and the mystery was intriguing. The ending however, was just as disappointing as the main character herself. It was also, nothing like Gone Girl. So don't go buy Dark Places thinking "Oh I loved Gone Girl, this one is bound to be good." You've been warned.

24 years old with an allowance

Early last week I talked about managing our spending better in 2015. Well our little Rios Duo received some exciting news last week (no I'm not pregnant). But it's not official yet, so we're just sitting here stewing in our own personal excitement until we hear anything else.


Anyway, this exciting news means we need to crunch down and cushion our saving account over the next couple months (again, no, I'm not with child) so we're going on a spending freeze of sorts.

Roland and I can't just say "don't spend anymore money" and that be that. We're not disciplined enough... maybe it's just me, Roland could probably do it. So instead of banning spending all together, we're allotting ourselves an allowance. We each get $20 a week to do with whatever we want. We've tried to do this before, and it worked for awhile, before the lines blurred as to what should be considered "allowance spending" and what should be considered "account spending". So this time, we're making strict(ish) guidelines so I know when I'm standing in line at Hobby Lobby, these calligraphy pens DEFINITELY are allowance spending.

Account Spending:
Groceries: Duh. This includes our food and Toby's food/treats.
Toby's Grooming: Sorry Toby, this is what your allowance goes to. Once a month we take him to get his ears and teeth cleaned, and his claws trimmed. He hates every minute of it.
Gas: Because our cars have to get around somehow...
Work-Related Clothing: Roland has to wear a suit everyday, and although he's gathering a nice collection, he still has some that could use some replacing. And usually he doesn't buy them unless they're a great deal. So suits, dress shirts, and under shirts for Roland.
Eating out: This is our splurge thing. Roland's boss/friend was moved a couple months ago, so now he's always ready to go to lunch with me, which I love, but it gets expensive, eating out for lunch, and then later in the week eating out for dinner too. So we're narrowing it down. We'll go to lunch once a week, and we'll go out to dinner once a week. Although it's still considered "frivolous spending" eating out is something we really enjoy.
Emergency Car Repairs: last year the week before the wedding I wrecked my car... into my dad's truck... we had money to fix it, but EVERYTHING in our savings account was either allotted to something for the wedding or honeymoon, it was really the worst timing ever. Eventually we took it in and they temporarily fixed it for $90.

Then there are things that probably aren't necessary, but we (I) just can't live without them.
Allowance Spending:
Shoes: I just got some new Uggs (which I'm kind of having buyers remorse over, shh), so I'm pretty much on a shoe ban for awhile.... but sometimes, I find a pair that are such a steal I can't just leave them behind. They'll haunt my dreams "Sarah! WHY DID YOU LEAVVVEEEE USSSSSSSSS?" So if I want shoes, they'll be bought with the allowance spending.
Casual Clothes: I pretty much wear whatever I want to work, thank goodness. But I don't really need anymore clothes right now. BUT Roland has a habit of saying "I need more casual clothes to wear outside of work" which he probably does, but then he buys a couple "casual" outfits and they never get worn. (Sorry dear). So casual clothes will not be account spending. Even if I say "but I can wear it to work too!"
Eating out alone: This is kind of wear the lines blurred last time. We also had an "eat out" budget and it wasn't clear that the eat out money was for when we were eating out together. Going to lunch with a friend or even buy yourself is qualified as allowance spending.
Traveling: Later this month I'm planning on going to Norman to go to a CHOCOLATE festival with a friend. If Roland were going with me, or if we were traveling further together, it would probably have it's own "vacation" fund..


This post is getting long, and that's all I can think of for now. I may update this occasionally if we run across some other things that blur the lines of allowance/account spending. As is life, I'm sure we will.

What are some of your budget tips?

Sniff Prints on your heart

Losing a dog is hard. When you lose a person, everyone understands that it's a heart wrenching event and that it's not something you'll get over anytime soon. Everyone is a person person. Not everyone is dog person.

You tell someone that your parents had to put your family dog down this week and you get a lot of "oh no that's so sad.. but it wasn't your dog.." "Oh no when did it happen? Tuesday? And you're still tearing up over random dog pictures?"

Buddy was our first family dog, we got him when we moved to Oklahoma 11 years ago. Eleven great years of watching him chase squirrels, having him follow me around when I eat because he knows I'll drop something. Eleven years of not having to clean up food when I drop it because I know he'll eat it, probably before it hits the floor.

A couple months ago my parents found out he had cancer and it was absorbing all his white blood cells, after a blood transfusion and several weeks of sitting on pins and needles, a blood test showed that it was all for not. The cancer was still absorbing all the blood cells. It was officially going to be his last Christmas.

When my dog-person friends asked me how I was, it was a lot easier to let it roll off, "I'm fine, it's best this way, he's in pain." But the week my brother was here it was a lot harder to act like we weren't going to think about the year my mom gave Buddy paint rollers for Christmas, then because he was soooo excited, she took them away because she was afraid they were laced with something.

Or the time Brandon and Buddy were playing on the floor when he was a puppy and Buddy just stopped and peed on Brandon's back.

Or how when Buddy was a puppy and I was learning how to play the flute, he would howl the whole time I played. Even if he was outside.

Or when I made up Buddy's song "Buddy Bear you have black hair, Buddy Bear you have your own chair, Buddy Bear you look like a Bear." And my Aunt said he didn't seem to like it, but I gave him my left over dinner, so I'm sure he did.

It's easier to not think about it, to not think about his hairy feet or sniff prints he left on your pants.. but is it fair? When people die, they're remembered and there's a funeral and they're talked about for years to come. There will probably be a memoir for Stuart Scott every January for the next 5-10 years. But for all the great years and memories that Buddy gave us, all he gets is a mold of his paw print and a vinyl sticker for our cars. It can't be enough.

But then again, maybe that's the way he wants it. Dogs come in our lives already with the greatest capacity to love. They're here for a short time gracing our lives with laughs and then in the end tears, so many tears. And for them, that's enough. All they want is to be loved in return (and maybe a couple pig ears to pass the time). And boy was he loved. That shedding, chair stealing beast was loved to the fullest capacity.

So here's to that dogs fully lived, fully loved life. May he have his own chair wherever he is now. And an abundance of pig ears.